Cyborg Circuit Overload Read online

  “You know,” said Raven. “The one about Wall.”

  “Oh, right!” said Cyborg cheerfully. “The Wall Show!” He held up the TV frame in front of an empty patch of wall.

  Raven nodded and smiled.

  “Huh,” said Robin, watching The Wall Show. “Is that stain new or from the last episode?”

  “I think it’s new,” replied Cyborg. Then a nasty bug crawled across the wall. “Look! It’s a crossover episode from The Cockroach Show.”

  As Starfire floated backward, Raven sniffed her teammate’s long curly hair. “The smell’s getting worse,” she reported.

  Robin tightened his hands into fists. “It’s not working, Cyborg,” he said.

  Cyborg grimaced. He quickly shifted the TV frame so it showed a slice of pizza lying on the table. “How about now?” he asked.

  The other Titans sniffed. They wrinkled their noses in disgust. A greenish cloud of stinky odor wafted around their heads.

  Cyborg pointed at them, terrified. “Your brains!” he screamed. “They’ve completely rotted!”

  Starfire’s green eyes became blank. She raised her arms out in front of her. “It is so… nice out…” she moaned like a zombie.

  “Let’s go… for a hike…” groaned Robin, shuffling from side to side.

  Beast Boy turned into a green zombie. “Join us,” he croaked to Cyborg, “for a game… of miniature golf… bro.”

  Raven moaned and groaned, too. “I’m taking… a French class,” she whimpered. “Zut alors!”

  “Your rotted brains are making you crazy!” Cyborg screeched. He stepped backward, scared out of his wits, until his back hit the wall.

  Grunting and sighing, Robin, Starfire, Beast Boy, and Raven shuffled toward him.

  “No!” hollered Cyborg, blocking his face with his arms. “No, I don’t want to do activities! You can’t make me!”

  Even with his face covered, Cyborg saw an intense flash of light shine throughout the room. He lowered his arms enough to see his teammates staggering backward from the surprising power of the mystery glow.

  Cyborg gasped when he saw that the big-screen TV, now completely alive, had stepped off the wall and onto the console. It had wiry arms and legs and a big droopy mustache. The TV seemed to be wearing the tiniest shorts Cyborg had ever seen.

  “TV?” asked Cyborg, amazed. “What are you doing here?”

  The television turned its forceful glow toward Cyborg. “I have raised countless children, Cyborg,” the TV said, “but you have always been my favorite. You might be surprised to know that all those years you spent staring at me, I was staring right back at you. It’s been a joy to help shape you into the man you are today. I love you, Cyborg.”

  A tear trailed down the human side of Cyborg’s face. “I love you, too, TV,” he whispered.

  The TV put an arm around Cyborg’s shoulders. “Now the only way to save your friends is to reverse their brain rot with quality programming.”

  Cyborg twisted to gesture at the TV’s glowing blank screen. “Turn yourself on, dude!” he said.

  The TV peered down at its own insanely complicated control panel. It shrugged. “I don’t know how these buttons work,” it said. “No one does. Where’s the remote?”

  “We lost it,” Cyborg said, hanging his head. “It could be anywhere.”

  The TV raised a fist. “Then we’re going to have to find it. Let’s go!”

  Cyborg nodded, and he and the TV zoomed around, searching for the remote. First they inspected every nook and cranny of Titans Tower, but they couldn’t find the remote anywhere. So they tooled around the neighborhood in a classic detective’s car on patrol. They interrogated a shifty suspect, who gave them a hot tip.

  That lead helped the TV and Cyborg track down a dirty bad guy, whom they chased, siren blaring and tires squealing, back to his hideout.

  The bad guy was keeping the remote hostage in a filthy warehouse! So the TV and Cyborg rescued the remote and escaped across the harbor on a speedboat while the hideout exploded dramatically behind them.

  When Cyborg and the TV got back to Titans Tower, they were attacked by Cyborg’s zombified teammates.

  Before the brainwashed Titans could grab Cyborg, he raised the remote control.

  Cyborg pressed the On button.

  The TV froze in place against the wall. Its screen lit up with a high-definition picture.

  The zombified Titans ceased their shuffling steps. Their blank eyes whirled as they stared at the show on the TV’s screen.

  Raven, Beast Boy, Robin, and Starfire rubbed their swelling heads as their brains restored to normal in the healing glow of the television. Their eyes returned to normal and they stopped moaning. Instead, they smiled at the TV.

  Robin blinked hard twice. “Thanks for fixing our brains, TV,” he said.

  “No problem,” the TV replied. “So… I was thinking, it’s such a beautiful day. Why don’t we all go on a hike? Or perhaps take in some culture at a museum?”

  The teenage heroes glanced at one another with worried expressions on their faces.

  The TV laughed. “I’m just messing with you,” it said. “Let’s watch hours of The B-Squad!”

  With a big, happy cheer, the Teen Titans jumped into the air, pumping their fists in celebration.

  One night, Cyborg arrived back at Titans Tower, exhausted from a long day of protecting the innocent. He yawned as he plodded into his room.

  “Bedtime,” he said with a weary sigh. “Lights out.”

  Cyborg flipped the wall switch and the room went dark.

  “And night-light on,” said Cyborg.

  He clicked on the night-light that was plugged into a wall socket. The night-light was even brighter than the regular lamps in his room.

  Cyborg flopped down on his recharging platform. He plugged himself in and settled down for a good rest.

  With a jolting fizzle, the night-light sputtered and flickered out.

  The room fell into total darkness.

  Both Cyborg’s human eye and his robot eye gleamed in the gloom. “Night-light out?” He gasped. “Lights on.” He scrambled out of bed and rushed over to the light switch. “Lights on!”

  Nothing happened, so Cyborg flicked the switch up and down a dozen more times. His voice grew shriller as he chanted, “Lights on! Lights on! Lights on! Lights on!”

  Finally, Cyborg gave up flicking the switch. He panted quietly in the deep darkness.

  A floorboard creaked under his steel boots.

  Cyborg let out a high shriek of terror. “I do not like the dark!” he hollered, bashing into furniture as he bounced around the inky dark room. “Got to find a light!” Something toppled onto the floor in a crash.

  With a gasp, Cyborg spotted four sets of glowing eyes staring into the room from the dark doorway.

  “Cyborg,” said a growly voice. “Is everything okay?”

  “We heard the screams of a small child,” added a female, worriedly.

  Cyborg shrieked again. “Eight-eyed monster!” he bellowed. Small rockets launched out of his shoulders, exploding in the doorway in blinding fireballs.

  The detonations were followed by screams and grunts, a whimper of pain… and then silence in the darkness.

  A few feet away, a small electric lantern lit up. Robin held the glowing lantern by its handle. Now Cyborg could see his teammates looking bedraggled, charred, and annoyed.

  “Oh, phew,” said Cyborg, wiping his forehead in relief. “I scared it off.” He stared at his friends for a moment, taking in how blasted and smoky they were. “Wow, that monster really did a number on you guys, huh?”

  His teammates glared.

  “Power went out,” said Robin. “I’ll check the grid in the morning—”

  “No!” Cyborg demanded, pointing a finger angrily in Robin’s face. “You will check the grid immediately!”

  The other Teen Titans glanced at one another, confused by Cyborg’s overreaction.

  Finally, Beast Boy transform
ed into a large green duck and nodded his beak thoughtfully. “Bro,” he guessed, “are you scared of the dark?”

  Cyborg stiffened. “Of course not!” he scoffed.

  “As your friends,” said Starfire sweetly, “we would understand.”

  Raven wiped rocket soot from her cloak. “I wouldn’t,” she said.

  “Yeah,” said Robin, agreeing with Raven. “Only babies are scared of the dark.”

  “I’m not scared of the dark,” Cyborg insisted. He leaned down closer to Robin. His half-mechanical face lit up in the lantern light, creepy like a ghoulish mask, his human eye wide with fright. “I’m scared of what hides in it,” he whispered.

  “Whoa,” said Beast Boy. He turned from a duck into a chicken. “Spooky.”

  “Right?” said Cyborg. His eyes unfocused and he shivered as he lost himself in a chilling, half-forgotten memory of his past. “It all started at a slumber party many years ago.…”

  In Cyborg’s memory, he was sitting on a puffy sleeping bag as a young kid, already half human, half robot. All around him was a raucous slumber party of super heroes in full force. Some kids in capes were having a pillow fight with kids in masks, feathers flying everywhere. Others danced to blaring music, wiggling their butts. Cyborg felt nervous. It was his first slumber party.

  Suddenly, the music cut off. Cyborg glanced up to see all the young heroes gathered around him with surprisingly serious expressions on their faces. The light in the room had fallen into gloom.

  He gulped, scared.

  “My friends forced me to play Scary Teri,” Cyborg explained to the Teen Titans, without letting go of the memory.

  Back at the slumber party, the creepy little heroes all had pushed Cyborg into a narrow storage room. It was dark and empty in the closet, except for an ornate mirror on one wall. The kids handed him a candle and slammed the door, shutting him inside alone.

  All Cyborg could see in the flickering, spooky candlelight was his own reflection in the mirror.

  “That stupid baby game that’s supposed to summon a scary ghost?” asked Robin.

  “It’s not a game,” replied Cyborg. “Gathering all of my courage,” he said, “I turned to the mirror and said the words.” He swallowed away his dry terror. “Scary Teri. Scary Teri. Scary Teri—”

  In the little storage room, Cyborg’s image in the silver mirror warped and swirled.

  A shocking, ghastly purple face popped into focus.

  Young Cyborg screamed at the top of his mechanical lungs.

  Back in Titans Tower, teen Cyborg screamed, too.

  He stopped shrieking when he saw his teammates shooting him irritated looks.

  Cyborg let his shoulders relax and then cleared his throat. “I barely escaped Scary Teri that night,” he said softly. “That’s why I’ve slept with a light on ever since.”

  A long, awkward pause followed Cyborg’s explanation.

  “Wow,” said Robin. “That is an embarrassing story.”

  Beast Boy peered up at Cyborg as an otter. “You know Scary Teri isn’t real, right?”

  “Not real?” replied Cyborg. “She almost ate my soul. Why is this so hard to believe?” He opened his hand toward their floating, purple-and-black-clad teammate. “Raven’s father is a demon!”

  Raven bobbed cross-legged in the air. “Yeah,” she said, “but he doesn’t waste his time hanging out at little kids’ sleepovers.” Her lips twitched. “Unless he’s, you know, totally bored.”

  Cyborg had a quick vision of Raven’s four-eyed, horned, bright red demon father, Trigon. He was kneeling at a slumber party, braiding a little girl’s hair and giggling as they gossiped. Cyborg shook his head to clear the disturbing thought.

  Robin put his hand on Cyborg’s metal arm. “Maybe we can help you get over your stupid, shameful, and completely unjustified fear,” he said.

  “How?” asked Cyborg.

  Starfire clasped her hands in excitement. “What if we held a party of slumber tonight?”

  “Slumber party!” the other Titans cheered together.

  The teenage teammates ran to their rooms and got dressed for the sleepover, zipping themselves into footy pajamas or other comfy sleepwear. Beast Boy turned into an elephant and grabbed his rolled-up sleeping bag in his trunk. Raven glanced around before hiding a small teddy bear in the folds of her sleep cloak. Robin fitted his teeth with orthodontic headgear, slipping the band around the back of his head.

  The Titans met back up in the living room and set up their sleeping bags on the floor around Robin’s lantern in front of their semicircular couch.

  Raven tilted her head at Robin’s headgear. “What is going on with that?” she asked.

  “Part of my never-ending war on crooked teeth,” Robin replied, lisping around the metal in his mouth. “I shall never surrender!”

  One of Robin’s teeth decided it was time to sneak out of place. It tilted crooked, but the orthodontic appliance snagged it and yanked it violently back into proper alignment.

  Robin yelped and pressed his fingers to his cheek outside the painful tooth. “Another victory,” he said, wincing.

  Cyborg nodded. He looked around at the sleeping bags set up around the lantern and his friends sitting in an arc around him. “So…” he said, “now we just… go to sleep?”

  “No way!” replied Beast Boy, turning into a wide-eyed owl. “Sleepovers aren’t about sleeping.”

  “They’re about all the awesome stuff you do instead of sleeping,” added Raven.

  Robin held up his gloved index finger. “First up,” he announced, “building the world’s best blanket fort…” He flipped open a large blanket, unfurling it wide.

  “Yeah!” the other Titans cheered. “Woo!”

  Robin pulled out a page of complicated schematics. “According to these very detailed blueprints I made!” he finished.

  His teammates heaved grumbling sighs.

  Robin smoothed out the blueprints on the floor. “We’ll start with laying the foundation,” he explained. “Then, in two hours, when that’s done, we can…”

  He trailed off as he saw that the other Teen Titans were staring at him in dismay.

  “Oh, come on,” argued Robin. “It’s not that complicated, once the primary support column is up—”

  Nobody else reacted. They held their expressions of blank disapproval.

  Robin rolled his eyes. “I’ll do it myself.” He plopped a hard hat on his head, took the corner of the big blanket, and got to work.

  “Hey, Cyborg?” asked Beast Boy, his voice impish. “Know the best part about slumber parties?” He turned into a green gorilla. “Pillow fight!” Beast Boy let out a war cry as he launched at Cyborg with his pillow raised for the attack.

  Starfire swooped in to intercept Beast Boy. She swatted him down with her pillow. Cyborg joined Starfire in smacking Beast Boy with their pillows until he was pummeled into a heap on the floor.

  “Raven, help!” cried Beast Boy. “I’m under attack!”

  Raven hovered cross-legged a few inches above her pillow on the floor. She flipped a page in the book she was reading. “No, thanks.”

  Cyborg gave Beast Boy another good whack on the head.

  “Raven, c’mon!”

  “I’m not playing,” replied Raven.

  Beast Boy popped up as a cute puppy with big pleading eyes. “Aw, please?” he begged Raven. “It won’t be fun if you don’t play!”

  Starfire, Cyborg, and Beast Boy held their pillows over their heads. “Pillow fight!” they chanted. “Pillow fight! Pillow fight!”

  Raven frowned. Without even giving her teammates a sideways glance, she conjured purplish dark-magic tentacles. The squidlike arms wriggled and snatched the pillows out of the other Titans’ grasps. Then the tentacles whacked Starfire, Cyborg, and Beast Boy on the head until they were smashed and lay crushed and defeated on the ground.

  “There,” said Raven. “Happy?”

  After they had all recovered from the pillow fight, Starfire, Be
ast Boy, Cyborg, and Raven fluffed their pillows and arranged their sleeping bags in a close, cozy circle. Behind them, Robin flipped down a welding mask and lit up the brilliant blue concentrated flame of a gas torch. Then he bent over out of view, constructing his blanket tent.

  Cyborg sat down in the circle of sleeping bags. He smiled at Starfire and Beast Boy. “I’m starting to feel better about the dark—”

  He jumped, startled and scared. “Oh my goodness, it’s a demon!” he squealed. “A demon!” Cyborg had only caught a glimpse of Raven out of the corner of his eye. He cowered beside her.

  “Really?” Raven asked. She fixed him with a level gaze as she bobbed in the air above her black sleeping bag.

  “You float there like a ghost,” said Cyborg, sitting up. “What do you want from me?”

  “Oooh, Titans!” chirped Starfire, changing the subject. “I know an activity to take Cyborg’s mind off his fear: the game of candor or audacious undertaking!”

  Beast Boy, Cyborg, and Raven blinked at Starfire blankly.

  “You mean truth or dare,” realized Raven.

  “Ohhhh,” said Beast Boy and Cyborg, nodding their heads.

  Starfire batted her eyelashes. “Who knows what crazy things I might do if given the dare!”

  With a whooshing sound, Robin appeared in the circle, bumping Beast Boy to the side. He gazed hopefully at Starfire. “I dare you to kiss—” He gasped. “No! I dare you to date me for a few years, and then move in with me, and then one night, when the moon is full, to watch me bend one down on one knee…”

  Cyborg blanked out for a while, weirded out by Robin’s dare overshare. When he focused back in again, Robin was still going.

  “… and to name our third child Carrie, after my favorite aunt…” Robin recited.

  Cyborg mentally left town again. He only came back to the bizarre monologue when it sounded like Robin was winding down.

  “… then to hold my hand as the sun goes down over the mountains and whisper in my ear, ‘It’s been a good life,’” Robin finished. “That is your dare.”